Counting the Apples in a Seed

"You can count the seeds in an apple, but you cannot count the apples in a seed." This quote came up on my Facebook newsfeed a few weeks ago, and I haven't been able to get it out of my head since. I'm sure there are a lot of applications, but the one that sticks with me the most is the idea of influence.

You may think you're just one person—a single apple—with a short time on this earth, so what good could you possibly do in the world? However, the "seeds" you plant in others by your kindness and good deeds have a profound and lasting effect on others, a ripple effect that continues until the world is indeed changed in some way because of you.

This thought is definitely uplifting, but I also found something else there that was nagging at me. It was a call to action, specifically about how I use my time. I started thinking about the things I fill my day with, asking the question, "By doing this thing, am I just eating my own apple, or am I planting its seeds?" Am I just scrolling mindlessly through Facebook, or am I seeking to add or promote uplifting content through it? Am I watching hours of TV, which only benefits me, or am I doing something that will somehow benefit others?

Now, don't get me wrong—I'm all about self-care. If we just "go go go" helping everyone else without also taking time for ourselves, we'll get burnt out. But I've noticed that, at least for me, self-care can very quickly deteriorate into self-indulgence if I'm not careful. And I've also noticed how truly happy I am when I'm engaged in worthwhile (influential) activities, much more so than when I'm binging on Netflix or oversleeping. Maybe this is what Jesus Christ meant in Matthew 16:25—"For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it." The greatest joy and fulfillment we find is in "losing" our time in making the world a better place, not by "saving" all that time for ourselves.

Every one of us can metaphorically plant our apple seeds by filling our time with service to others, creative pursuits, and self-improvement. This will look different for every person because we all have different talents and opportunities. But know this—you do have something to offer the world, and the seeds you plant matter. Ultimately, the more seeds we plant, the more apples we can enjoy: not just our own, but also the fruits of our labors in the lives of countless others.

What I Learned From 125,000 Rounds of Chutes and Ladders

In church on Sunday, the teacher compared our lives to a game of Chutes and Ladders. Sometimes things go well, and we seem to be climbing all the ladders, but at other times, the chutes seem to always bring us back to square one.

I remembered that about a year ago, I was bored and decided to write a computer program simulating the game. I wanted to know how many turns it takes on average to win by reaching the 100th square.

After running the game simulation 125,000 times, the program calculated that it takes an average of 39 turns to win the game. But what about the minimum and the maximum number of turns? What if you were the luckiest player ever and rolled the perfect series of numbers? Or what if you were the unluckiest player and couldn't seem to reach the last square for the life of you? Well, here are the statistics:

• The minimum number of turns to win the game was 7.
• The maximum number of turns to win the game was ... 417. That's almost 60 times more than the minimum number!

So, I got to thinking about how this relates to life.

It might seem like some people have life pretty easy. They seem to have everything going for them—a strong support system, excellent physical and mental health, talents that make it easy to be successful, and so on. They get through the game of life in an easy 7 turns, so to speak.

Most people are probably in the realm of 39 turns, hitting both chutes and ladders throughout their lives.

And then there are the people who seem to always be swimming upstream, facing obstacle after obstacle. And even when they manage to significantly move forward at one point, those blasted chutes just keep bringing them down. Or they might roll only 1s and 2s, making progress annoyingly slow. Surely they climb ladders along the way, but it's hard to be happy about it when you know another chute is lingering right around the corner!

So, if you feel like you're in that final category, take heart in knowing this: the only way to lose the game is to stop playing. If you just keep persevering and rolling that die—time after time, turn after turn—eventually you will make it to the final square. Even if it takes you 417 turns.

A Miraculous Turn of Events: 2,000 Years Ago and Today

Recently I experienced a series of seemingly insignificant events that led to a very significant message from God. Today as I was thinking about this, I realized how similar it is to the New Testament story when Jesus Christ directs Peter to go fishing in order to find the money needed to pay a tax.

The Coin in the Fish's Mouth

"Go thou to the sea, and cast an hook, and take up the fish that first cometh up; and when thou hast opened his mouth, thou shalt find a piece of money: that take, and give unto them for me and thee." (Matthew 17:27)

This story, in my opinion, is one of the most fascinating of Christ's miracles. It may seem simple and mundane at first, but what astounds me is the turn of events that needed to happen in order for the miracle to occur:

• Somebody was carrying a four-drachma coin, which was the exact amount Peter would later need to pay the tax (two drachma for him and two for Jesus).

• This person lost that coin in the Sea of Galilee (an area of 64 square miles).

• A fish managed to pick this coin up at some point and keep it in its mouth.

• This fish happened to be in the exact place that Peter would cast his line, and it was the very first fish to get caught on the line.

Peter had a need, and our omnipotent God began a miraculous series of events to satisfy this need, even before the need was even known! And what touches me even more is that the money would go toward fixing a mistake that Peter himself made (by answering incorrectly about Jesus owing taxes). This shows that even when our trials are of our own making, God still has compassion on us and wants to help us solve our problems.

So, do miracles like this happen in our day? Based on events in my own life this last week, I can definitely say yes, they do!

Much-Needed Comfort ... in a Roundabout Way

Without getting into much detail, I've had some health problems recently that have naturally come with a long trail of medical bills. It's not more than we can handle, but it's been a stressor for me, especially because the dozens of medical tests have yielded no results. This has been really weighing on me lately, but as usual, an omnipotent God came through with answers ... through a miraculous turn of events:

• My daughters got sick with colds at the end of last week.

• On Sunday, my husband offered to stay home with them during sacrament meeting so that I could go. Because I was without my kids, I was able to actually listen and focus!

• The assigned speakers didn't take the entire time, so our bishop was inspired to ask two young women to come and bear their testimonies. One of the young women briefly shared that she's had some health problems recently but has been able to develop greater faith through it all.

• I felt impressed to reach out to this young woman, so I texted her and asked her to share her experiences with me. She suggested that we meet up and talk.

• On Monday evening, she came over and we had a really good discussion. I learned a lot from her, like the importance of praying often when dealing with health issues.

• She mentioned a book she was reading (given to her by another member of the ward) that has also helped her out. Later that night, she actually delivered a copy of the book to me, saying that she felt impressed to just go out and buy it for me because it felt time-sensitive.

• On Tuesday night, I was feeling really off-balance because of the financial stress, and I asked Heavenly Father to help me find balance again.

• On Wednesday evening, I didn't have any freelancing work to do, so I picked up the book. I noticed there was a chapter on money and turned right to it.

And there, in that chapter, was my four-drachra coin: the exact thing that I needed in order to find balance again. Several quotes really stood out to me, including these two:

"Start burring the boundaries between money coming in and money going out. Both flows sustain and nourish you. Just as a plant takes in carbon dioxide and releases oxygen, we must both receive money and release it." [185] 

"Within your emotional reaction to every money issue, opportunity, debt, bill, or challenge is an opportunity to find joy. Alarmed by those overcharge drafts you incurred? First, shift your original fear into joy by being grateful that you have a bank account. Now pay attention to the message of fear, which says that it's time to take action." [190]

These simple gems of wisdom were enough to lift my burden, pulling me out of my rut and helping me refocus on the future with joy.

A One-Time Thing?

After this happened, I thought back to all the events that led to that point, and I was in awe at the goodness of God. But that got me thinking: was this really just a one-time thing, or is God that involved in our lives all the time and we just don't see it? It reminds me of a scripture in the Book of Mormon:

"And then shall they rejoice; for they shall know that it is a blessing unto them from the hand of God; and their scales of darkness shall begin to fall from their eyes." (2 Nephi 30:6)

I think that in a coming day, the "scales of darkness" will also fall from our eyes as we look back on our lives and realize just how intricately the Lord was involved in blessing us. And as we wait for that glorious day, perhaps we can pray to discern these small yet significant miracles in our lives right now.

The story of the coin in the fish's mouth is a reminder to us all that God is all-knowing, all-powerful, and truly wants to help us. It requires a little effort on our part—having the faith to "cast your line" out there—but our efforts will always be preceded and followed by God's often unseen blessings. As the Lord Himself says, "I will go before your face. I will be on your right hand and on your left, and my Spirit shall be in your hearts, and mine angels round about you, to bear you up." (D&C 84:88) I know that this is true, and I hope and pray that we all feel that a little bit more in our lives.

The Kingdom of Heaven

The Kingdom of Heaven

Written by Liz Kazandzhy while serving a mission in Ukraine

The kingdom of heaven is like a pearl of great price

To a merchant man seeking such treasure,

Who, when he discovered its matchless beauty,

Went and sold all he had with pleasure.

From his home he collected his rubies;

From his shop, all his silver and gold;

From his yard, all the gems he had buried;

Now all with intent to be sold.

He went to his places of hiding

Where diamonds had laid for so long.

He remembered his favorite topaz—

So golden, translucent, and strong.

He gathered them all for the selling,

For he knew it would cost all he had.

Some who saw watched him with wonder

While others were sure he was mad.

Was it hard? Oh you can't imagine

The war that was waged in his soul!

But with every doubt he remembered

The image of one priceless pearl.

And when all was gathered and ready,

He went to the market to trade.

"All that you have in exchange for the pearl"—

With pleasure the bargain was made.

The kingdom of heaven is like the worth of a soul

To a missionary seeking to serve,

Who, when he discovered the grace of the Lord,

Put his life for two years on reserve.

At home he left friends and his family,

Took leave from employment and school.

He put away favorite hobbies,

All to become the Lord's tool.

While serving, he discovered his weakness,

Habits he'd held to for years,

Traits not entirely Christlike,

Like pride and doubt and fears.

He cast them off each one by one,

For he knew the Lord needed his all.

Many admired his service

While others thought he was a fool.

Was it hard? Oh how you can't imagine

The war that was waged in his soul!

But always the image he kept in his mind:

A child of God, saved and whole.

And when he had finished his mission,

He went to the Lord and heard,

"All of your might in exchange for your soul."

"But wait," he thought, "what was that word?

My own soul I never considered;

It was not for myself that I gave

My heart and my might, my mind and my strength,

So why is it I have been saved?"

And thus he discovered the secret,

The irony of this great labor:

You thrust in your sickle for others

Yet bring to yourself God's favor.

In teaching, you're filled with His knowledge;

In serving, you're filled with His love;

In daily fulfilling His work and His glory,

You're filled with His power from above.

Oh, the kingdom of heaven, what an honor to build

While the God of that kingdom builds you!

"All that I have in exchange for your will"—

Thus He blesses the faithful and true.

Reflection Questions

• How have you noticed God building you as you've striven to build His kingdom?
• In what ways have you been blessed by your sacrifices?
• What are some things you could "cast off" from your life right now in order to be closer to Heavenly Father and the Savior?

What If God Were Your Employer?

Since the beginning of the year, I've gotten really into the freelancing scene as an editor on Upwork.com. Throughout the day when I have downtime, I browse and apply to different jobs. And then in the evening, I work on the jobs that I get hired for. It was difficult starting out because I was competing with other freelancers with more experience on Upwork, but I persevered and was hired for a few small jobs. Because of positive client feedback, this has had a snowball effect, leading to many more jobs since.

There was a certain day when I was playing with my 2-year-old daughter Katya, and my mind was unfortunately more occupied on how to land my next contract on Upwork than on giving my full attention to her. But then I had a simple thought, surely from the Holy Ghost: "What if this—being a mother—was an Upwork job?"

Here I was, spending any time I could reading job descriptions, bidding for contracts, and performing each job to the very best of my ability, especially for the sake of getting positive feedback. And yet I also had a "job" right in front of me: being a mother to my daughter. And that got me thinking ... what if God were my employer? What would His job description be for my different roles? How am I doing in fulfilling them? And what feedback would He write about me and my work? Here are some things I came up with as I thought about these questions.

How would God write your "job description"?

All of us have different roles in our lives. Family roles could include spouse, parent, child, sibling, aunt/uncle, grandparent, etc. Professional roles differ depending on your field of work. Perhaps you're involved in other things, like pursuing an education or participating in service organizations. A calling at Church certainly counts as a role as well.

Try making a list of all of your roles: all of the "jobs" you're striving to perform and balance in your life. And then ask yourself for each of them, "What does God expect of me in this role?" In other words, how would God write each "job description"?

I think sometimes we get so caught up in our daily, mundane tasks that we forget to see the bigger picture. Am I changing diapers, cooking meals, and chasing kids around every day? Well yeah, but that's the how, not the what (and certainly not the why). What I'm really doing, or rather what I'm trying to do, is this:

Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, and to teach them to love and serve one another, observe the commandments of God, and be law-abiding citizens wherever they live.

Heavenly Father even goes on to share how we can be successful in our family roles:

Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities.

Seeing your life's roles from a higher, more divine perspective can help keep you on the right track and motivate you in moving forward.

How can you communicate with Him about your "work"?

Upwork has a very convenient message system through which freelancers and clients can communicate. As I perform a job, I stay in close communication with my client to make sure I understand expectations and can ask questions when issues arise.

How can we communicate with God as we seek to perform His work? As the popular phrase goes, "When we want to speak to God, we pray. And when we want Him to speak to us, we search the scriptures; for His words are spoken through His prophets. He will then teach us as we listen to the promptings of the Holy Spirit" (Robert D. Hales). It's important to do this every day since our lives are filled with questions that often only He can answer.

Through prayer, we can share our concerns with our Heavenly Father and ask specific questions about the issues we're facing in our various roles. We can also ask Him what He thinks about our lives, what's going well, and what we could improve. It's always a little scary to ask questions like this that make you vulnerable, but in my experience, it's so worth it.

After we've expressed our questions and concerns to God, He will respond to our prayers if we humbly and diligently seek answers. This revelation can come in a variety of ways: from the scriptures, general conference, and other Church resources certainly, but it could also be in the words of a song, an inspired Facebook post, or a conversation with a friend. It might just be your own thoughts and feelings as you take time to ponder these things.

One example of this happened to me last week. I was having a hard time with something, and on a drive to a friend's house, a song came on the radio with the lyrics, "Would you choose water over wine?" I have no idea the original meaning that Incubus intended for these lyrics, but for me, they were an answer to prayer. The question I heard instead was this: "Are you going to hold on to your hurt and let your pride keep you from progressing, or will you humble yourself and let the Savior transform that hurt into healing?" Why was I choosing water over wine, not allowing the Lord to miraculously change me?

This is just one example of personal revelation I've received. I know that the heavens are open to anyone who seeks God's approval and desires to communicate with Him. He knows how best to communicate with you specifically, and He will tell you everything you need to do in order to perform your tasks and live your life in the very best way possible.

What does God think of your "job performance"?

Have you ever asked Heavenly Father what He thinks about how you're fulfilling your various roles? I don't think this is something we're used to doing. Sure, we may pray often, thanking Heavenly Father for our blessings and requesting help for ourselves and others. But have you ever just flat out asked God what He thinks about you? Maybe there's a spiritually self-conscious part of us that is afraid of what He might say. After all, He sees the big picture and knows us perfectly, including all of our flaws.

Nonetheless, I invite you to try this. Pray to God and ask, "Heavenly Father... how do you feel about me? How do you think I'm doing as a [insert role here]?" I don't know what His answer will be, or how He'll manifest that to you, but I know one thing for sure: He loves you, no matter what. And He is eager to tell you that.

Also, if there are things you can improve, which surely is the case for all of us, He'll let you know gradually, with love, understanding, and patience. He's not some uncaring boss just looking for an excuse to call you out or fire you. He's the type of boss who understands that His workers are just as important as His work. In fact, we are His work: "For behold, this is [His] work and [His] glory—to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of [all of us]" (Moses 1:39).

I hope that we can all strive to see our lives as God does, stay in close communication with Him, and eventually receive His glorious feedback, "Well done, thou good and faithful servant: thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy Lord." (Matthew 25:21)

Share your own thoughts

What do you think God expects of you in your various roles? How does thinking about this change the way you live your life? Feel free to share in the comments section!

Jesus Christ: 10 Illuminating Light Metaphors that Teach Us About the Light of the World

How is light a blessing in our lives? As I read John 1 this week, I thought about this question and how it relates to Jesus Christ, His character, and His mission. In John 1:9, the Savior is described as “the true Light, which lighteth every man that cometh into the world.” Here are ten examples of light that helped me better understand Jesus Christ.

1. The Sun - "Nothing is More Important"

I love the answer that pops up when you ask Google about the importance of the sun: “Nothing is more important to us on Earth than the Sun. Without the Sun's heat and light, the Earth would be a lifeless ball of ice-coated rock. The Sun warms our seas, stirs our atmosphere, generates our weather patterns, and gives energy to the growing green plants that provide the food and oxygen for life on Earth.”

I don't think it's a coincidence that the words sun and Son are homonyms. Nothing is more important to us than the Son. Without the Son's Atonement, our existence would be a hopeless mess because sin would permanently stain us and death would permanently kill us. The Son warms our hearts, stirs our consciences to do good, generates forgiveness from sin and resurrection from death, and gives us peace in a world that's in dire need of it.

The physical and mental health benefits of sunlight are tremendous. When I was struggling with depression, I would try to get as much sunlight as I could because I knew it would lift my mood. Whenever we go through dark times, we can also try to get as much of the Son's light through prayer, the scriptures, service, Priesthood blessings, uplifting music and videos, and so on.

2. House Lights - Helping Us Navigate Life

The next kind of lights we see and use the most are the lights in our homes. You might not appreciate them much until your electricity goes out and you're left to stumble around, tripping over junk that you forgot to put away. In short, these lights help you see things clearly to be able to navigate around your home quickly and safely.

All of us are trying to navigate our "earthly home" during this mortal life. By following Jesus Christ, we can do so successfully and joyfully. He can guide us in making important life decisions, and we won't stumble as much over things that lead to sorrow. And when we do stumble, He will light the way back for us. In essence, He will do exactly what "I am a Child of God" says:

Lead me, guide me, walk beside me,

Help me find the way.

Teach me all that I must do

To live with [God] someday.

3. Night Lights - Calming our Fears

Many children need a night light to calm their fear of the dark. About this fear, one article says, "It’s not the darkness itself that’s frightening. It’s the fear of what the darkness masks." In other words, it's the fear of the unknown.

Our lives are full of unknowns. Will I ever get married? Will I be able to find a job? How can I heal my broken marriage? Will I be able to get through this devastating trial? Because of the light of Jesus Christ and the Holy Ghost, God can give us revelation, helping us find the answers to the questions that burn in our hearts. And even if specific answers don't come, God can give you a deep assurance that everything is going to be okay.

Also, there are things that are unknown to many people but are made clear in the gospel of Jesus Christ, like "Where did I come from?" "What is my purpose in life?" and "Where will I go after this life?"

4. Porch Lights - Inviting Us Home

When I was a teenager and would come home late in the evening, my mom would always leave the porch light on for me. Maybe it was for safety (not tripping over anything) or maybe just for convenience (not having to search long to find the right key), but there was something deeper there. It was like a warm invitation to return home, a reminder that I was loved and cared for.

Jesus Christ is our constant reminder that Heavenly Father loves us and is watching out for us. God wants us to come home to Him, and He sent Jesus Christ so that this would be possible. For anyone who has strayed from Christ's teachings, or those who have never lived them, God's "porch light" is always on, inviting all of His children to repent and return to Him.

5. Christmas Lights - Bringing Beauty and Joy

Whenever my family puts up our Christmas tree and decorate it with lights, it immediately brings a wonderful spirit into our home. (In fact, we love it so much that we don't take down our tree until late January!) There's just something about the simply beauty of bright, colorful Christmas lights that warms the soul and brings peace and joy.

Jesus Christ has brought so much joy into my life. When I study about Him and strive to apply His teachings to my life, I'm just happier—every time. I'm a more pleasant person to be around. I feel at peace, even when things around me seem to be falling apart. And the more I focus on Jesus Christ, the more beauty I see in the world around me, especially in other people and even in myself.

6. Stoplights - Keeping Order in a Chaotic World

Have you ever been in a large intersection when the stoplights are broken? It can be total chaos! These lights keep order for us, and without them there would be all sorts of accidents and problems. Some people may find it annoying to get stuck at one red light after another, but I think we'd all agree that life with stoplights is much better than life without them.

Following Jesus Christ gives our lives order in an often chaotic world. There are so many competing voices in the world. Just look through this list of "loud, persistent, persuasive, and appealing voices" that President Faust mentioned:

• Murmuring voices that conjure up perceived injustices.
• Whining voices that abhor challenge and work.
• Seductive voices that offer sensual enticements.
• Soothing voices that lull us into carnal security.
• Intellectual voices that profess sophistication and superiority.
• Proud voices that rely on the arm of flesh.
• Flattering voices that puff us up with pride.
• Cynical voices that destroy hope.
• Entertaining voices that promote pleasure seeking.
• Commercial voices that tempt us to “spend money for that which is of no worth, [and our] labor for that which cannot satisfy.”
• Delirious voices that spawn the desire for a “high.”

Jesus Christ's voice, on the other hand, "inviteth and enticeth to do good continually" (Moroni 7:13). It leads us to peace in this life and eternal life in the world to come. Some may not like being "limited" by God's commandments, but as the popular Primary song goes, "in this there is safety and peace."

7. Car Lights - Enhancing our Relationships

Besides headlights that are vital to guiding us while driving in the dark, I've always appreciated other vehicle lights like blinkers and brake lights. These help us to communicate with one another as drivers because we know other driver's intentions. They can help us avoid dangerous situations with one another.

I feel like the gospel of Jesus Christ has helped me tremendously in developing and maintaining relationships with others. When I think about how much God forgives me, it makes it easier to forgive others. I pray for charity to have patience with my children and to see the best in the people around me. I find inspiration in the scriptures to help me control my temper. Love is the essence of the gospel, and I want it to be the essence of my life too.

8. Siren Lights - Providing Necessary Discipline

If you're like me, your heart skips a beat every time you see flashing blue and red lights behind you as you're driving. But as unpleasant as it is to get pulled over and be issued a ticket for breaking traffic rules, this is a necessary practice to preserve the safety of society.

God has certain laws (commandments), and breaking those laws (sinning) has certain consequences. This is necessary for both the physical and spiritual safety of everyone. So even though Jesus Christ is strict in His teachings, it's ultimately for the best and keeps you safe in so many ways. And when we do sin, we can repent and be forgiven through His Atonement.

9. Flashlights - There in Times of Need

When I think of flashlights, my first two thoughts are camping and blackouts. They provide us light when no other sources of light are available, and they can be absolutely vital in emergency situations.

Whenever we don't know what to do, or when nothing else seems to be working, we can turn to the Savior for help. He can give us the light that we desperately seek. This reminds me of the hymn “Where Can I Turn for Peace”:

1. Where can I turn for peace?

Where is my solace

When other sources cease to make me whole?

When with a wounded heart, anger, or malice,

I draw myself apart, Searching my soul?

2. Where, when my aching grows,

Where, when I languish,

Where, in my need to know, where can I run?

Where is the quiet hand to calm my anguish?

Who, who can understand?

He, only One.

3. He answers privately,

Reaches my reaching

In my Gethsemane, Savior and Friend.

Gentle the peace he finds for my beseeching.

Constant he is and kind,

Love without end.

We don't have to wait for a spiritual or temporal emergency to seek the Savior. The sooner we reach out to Him, the sooner He can heal us, help us, and make us whole.

10. The Spotlight - Helping Us Focus on What Matters Most

In theatrical productions, the spotlight is used to focus the attention of the audience on the most important things happening on stage. If it weren’t for the spotlight, we could easily get distracted by everything else going on.

Likewise, Jesus Christ and His prophets help us stay focused on what matters most in life, like our families and serving others. They also help us to avoid distractions that eat away at our time and reduce the quality of our lives, like excessive technology use.

Elder Jack N. Gerard taught the following:

"We live in a world of information overload, dominated by ever-increasing distractions that make it more and more difficult to sort through the commotion of this life and focus on things of eternal worth. Our daily lives are bombarded with attention-grabbing headlines, served up by rapidly changing technologies.

"Unless we take the time to reflect, we may not realize the impact of this fast-paced environment on our daily lives and the choices we make. We may find our lives consumed with bursts of information packaged in memes, videos, and glaring headlines.

How do we rise above the distractions of this world and stay fixed on the vision of eternity before us? President Dallin H. Oaks counseled, 'We have to forego some good things in order to choose others that are better or best because they develop faith in the Lord Jesus Christ and strengthen our families.'

May I suggest that the best things in this life are centered on Jesus Christ and understanding the eternal truths of who He is and who we are in our relationship with Him."

Other Lights?

Which of these lights resonated the most with you and why? How has Jesus Christ been a light in your life? I'd love to hear your thoughts!

Ministering

Ministering

Talk given by Liz Kazandzhy on 8/19/18

Introduction

For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Liz Kazandzhy. My husband Vlad is from Ukraine, and we have two daughters: Katya, who’s 2 years old, and Sophia, who’s 4 months old.

The topic of my talk today is ministering. It’s something we’ve been hearing a lot about in the Church recently, but I hope my remarks today will help us to better understand this important topic. I’ll be talking about three things: first, what ministering is; second, what gets in our way of doing this; and third, how children and youth can participate in ministering.

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What is ministering?

So what does “ministering” mean? If you look in the dictionary, it says simply that to minister means “to attend the needs of someone.” And since we all have different needs, and we’re all in different places, that means that there’s no “one-size-fits-all” ministering. Perhaps that’s one of the differences between the old way (home and visiting teaching) and the new way. Previously, you could fulfill your assignment by sharing a universal message once a month. Now, your message and your actions are based on the needs of those you minister to.

Also, needs are both spiritual and temporal. But as we read in D&C 29:34, the Lord says, “All things unto me are spiritual, and not at any time have I given unto you a law which was temporal.” So when you’re helping somebody with their temporal needs, you might not think that you’re making a huge impact spiritually, but most of the time you are.

As for how to minister, I’ve found that it can be done in two simple steps, both of which start with A. The first A is to be AWARE. Get to know those you minister to so you can actually discern their needs, be on the lookout to recognize the needs of others, and try to look outside of yourself more. The second A is to ACT. Being aware of needs won’t do any good if we don’t act to then fulfill those needs.

I recently experienced a great example of ministering based on these principles. A few months ago, my ministering sister, Sister Maughan, texted me and asked, “Hey, how’s everything going after having your baby?” and of course added the age-old question, “Is there anything you need?” I replied, “Things are going pretty well. I can’t think of anything right now, but I’ll let you know!” And then a little while later, she replied, “I’m hosting a play date at my house tomorrow. Could I take your girls for a couple hours?” And I thought, “YES! That is exactly what I need!” (Just so you know, if you ever want to serve a young mother… just take her children. Anywhere. For as long as you want.) I didn’t even realize that’s what I needed, but Sister Maughan was aware of my needs and acted with inspiration to fulfill them. My kids had a great time at her house, and I was able to get a lot of important things done during that time. Again, you might think that this was just temporal service, but it touched me in a very spiritual way because I felt loved and cared for. I felt valued that someone was willing to do that for me. Ultimately, I felt the love of God through Sister Maughan.

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What gets in our way of ministering?

So if we know what ministering is, what keeps us from doing it?

We’re too busy or we forget

I think one of the biggest reasons is that we’re too busy or just forget to do it. This has always been the bane of home and visiting teaching and now the ministering program.

If you’re having a hard time remembering to minister, I suggest you create reminders for yourself to keep them in your prayers and keep reaching out. After a while, you’ll probably find that you don’t even need the reminders anymore because those you minister to will just be a natural part of your life—your friends. And most people don’t need reminders to remember their friends. As for finding the time to minister, it’s true—it takes time. But like anything in the gospel, you’ll be blessed for doing it. I know that God will bless you in every other sphere of your life if you’ll make the time to minister to His children.

We don’t know what to do

Another reason we don’t minister is because we feel like we don’t know what to do. Something that helps me with this is the phrase “mysteries of God.” In the scriptures, we often read that the mysteries of God can be revealed to us. I used to think this meant deep gospel doctrine, like what we’re going to eat in heaven or things like that. But really, a mystery is anything you don’t know. It might be a mystery to you how you’re gonna get through school or provide for your family. It may be a mystery to you how to handle a difficult child. And in this case, it may be a mystery to you about how to get through to somebody you minister to.

Regarding this, there’s a wonderful promise found in Alma 26:22—“Yea, he that repenteth and exerciseth faith, and bringeth forth good works, and prayeth continually without ceasing—unto such it is given to know the mysteries of God; yea, unto such it shall be given to reveal things which never have been revealed; yea, and it shall be given unto such to bring thousands of souls to repentance, even as it has been given unto us to bring these our brethren to repentance.” I know that if we follow this counsel, God will bless us with personal revelation to know the needs of those we minister to and the ability to attend to those needs.

We’re afraid we’ll offend someone or do more harm than good

Another thing that stands in our way is the fear of giving offense or doing more harm than good. I have a quick story about this. When I was in college, there was a time when I felt like all my good intentions were being thwarted and just turning out really bad. It got to the point where I was actually scared of trying to help people. But then one day, when I was walking outside near the library, a guy had dropped a paper that started blowing away in the wind. I happened to be right in the path of the paper, so I stomped my foot down right on it, keeping it from blowing away. But in the few seconds it took for the guy to reach me and retrieve the paper, I started worrying and thought, “Oh no! What if this is some super important paper, and now I’ve ruined it by stepping on it with my dirty shoe?!” And right as the guy was reaching down to get it, I lifted my foot up because of my fears, and the paper again blew away in the wind. I watched as this poor guy chased it all across the courtyard, and I didn’t even see if he caught it or not.

I realized then that that’s what happens when we worry about how our service will be received: great opportunities just fly away from us. Please try not to let this happen. And trust me—if your heart is in the right place, you will do so much more good than harm.

We think the person has everything under control

Lastly, we might just think that the people we minister to have everything under control and that there’s nothing you need to do. You might look at some people, maybe ward or stake leaders or just the “spiritual giants” in your life, and think that they’re just amazing at everything and that their lives are perfect. Please… never think this. Nobody has everything under control. And if they do, it’s just for like 5 seconds, which is just long enough for them to take a picture and put it on Facebook.

I’ll give you an example of this. During my pregnancy, and a little bit after, I suffered from serious depression for the first time in my life. Very few people knew about it, and I got really good at putting on a mask that made it seem like everything was fine with me. But it wasn’t—it was horrible. There were probably a lot of people who looked at me and thought that everything was great. But I’m grateful for the people that didn’t assume that, the people who reached out and offered love, help, and much-needed friendship.

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How can children and youth get involved in ministering?

The last thing I want to talk about is how children and youth can get involved in ministering. As the Primary president, I get to see firsthand the goodness of children—the goodness of your children. One thing I love about kids is their willingness to serve. My two-year-old, Katya, absolutely loves to “help” around the house, like putting dishes away or even taking Sophia’s dirty diapers to the trash can. The other day she even “helped” wrap the vacuum cord back onto the side of the vacuum, and it looked like a total disaster (though a very cute disaster). Anyway, the point is—take advantage of that attribute while they’re young. Ministering ultimately starts in the home. Teach your children how to minister, point out when they’re ministering and express appreciation toward them, and help them feel and recognize the joy that comes from ministering. There are so many opportunities at home to be aware of the needs of your family members and act to fulfill them.

When kids start school, that opens another door for ministering. Children can be on the lookout for other kids who seem lonely, left out, or bullied, and they can be kind to them. If they’re good at a certain subject, they can help others with it. Again, teach them to strive to be aware of others and act to help them.

Children and youth can also minister at church. They can reach out to kids who don’t come very often. They can sit next to someone who is lonely or new. They can do something kind for their teachers. I love the example of our Primary children when we do “Scripture Chase,” a kind of race to find a selected scripture reference. There are many times when I’ve seen that those who find it quickly often turn to their neighbors to help them do the same.

Perhaps the most natural way to get children and youth involved in ministering is to just take them with you when you minister. The other day, the Tessems came to our house with their whole family and gave us fresh vegetables and delicious zucchini bread. You can write letters to people as a family, bake something together and take it to someone, visit the elderly or others as a family, and so much more.

A few months ago, I saw a homeless man outside of Target, and since I had some spare time and some spare change, I decided to help him. Katya was with me, so I parked the car, we walked up to him together, and then I handed Katya four quarters, one at a time, which she in turn gave the homeless man. It was so touching. I did that because I want my daughter to know that helping is important, that it brings joy, and that everyone deserves our love. As we minister with our children, they can have a significant impact on others, they will learn from our example, and they will know firsthand the joy that comes from ministering.

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Conclusion

I’d like to conclude with a story that happened just yesterday. I was with Katya over at the park by the mall. While she was playing, this little red-headed boy—probably about 6 years old—decided that Katya was like his new best friend. It started out as he rocked up and down on the see-saw with her, and then he said, “Hey, do you want to go down the slide?” So they went over to another area, and he climbed up a rope ladder, turned around, and then helped Katya up, telling her things like, “Wow, you’re doing so good! You’re so strong!” and then lifted her up when she was near the top. Then they went down the slide together. After doing that a few times, he asked, “Do you want to go around the merry-go-round?” So he stopped the merry-go-round that had a few kids on it, helped Katya onto it, and then pushed it around.

This whole time, I was just sitting off to the side, smiling. I felt so much joy, and I felt tremendous gratitude for this boy who, for really no reason at all, took it upon himself to play with and take care of my little girl. And as I sat there, I realized, “This is exactly how Heavenly Father feels when we minister to one another.” He is filled with joy and gratitude toward us for taking care of His children. I hope that we will all strive to more fully minister to one another as we make our way through this mortal journey, and I know that we will be blessed for doing so.